Well, hello everyone! Yes, it has been a while since I have shared my thoughts and feelings with all ya'll in Jillsville. Today happens to be New Years Eve 2017. We are going to be saying goodbye to 2017 and hello to 2018.
When I first got sober, in fact, it was my first year in AA I was so worried when December 31st rolled around. I was only 4 months sober and still a bit shaky. My sponsor, at the time, was Margaret, she was also an old drinking buddy of mine. I was fortunate in more ways than one to have her in my corner in the beginning of my sobriety. She sat me down and said to me, Jill it's just another day. My response to her was, Oh Hell No It Isn't! Well, actually yes it is.
That year she took me to the place that I first got sober in Aberdeen, NC. They were having what is known as an Alcathon. All day and all night meetings. The building stayed open and the coffee and the meetings flowed. That's where I spent my first sober New Years Eve. I was surrounded by a bunch of sober drunks playing board games and having back to back meetings and flooding my bladder with coffee. It was good to know that I was not the only one that felt that New Year's Eve wasn't just another day.
I have had 27 years of New Year's Eve's and it's good to know that it IS just another day! My New Years Eve is going to be spent at home with my wife and critters. We will be warm and cozy and probably in bed asleep by 9pm. Tomorrow we will wake up feeling good and loved in the knowledge of knowing we spent this "Just another day" together. For that, I am eternally grateful.
Happy New Years Everyone! May 2018 find everyone in good health and good spirits.
These are my Thoughts and Feelings from Jillsville.
Sunday, December 31, 2017
Monday, January 2, 2017
Family Stuff
Have you ever had an intense telephone conversation and wished that you had said more than you did? Yep. I had one of those on Saturday. It was with a family member who has disowned me. So many times I go over this in my mind. Trying to figure it all out. Why? What happened? What's the deal? Sometimes just maybe there is nothing to figure out.
With the New Year coming up I figured well, let me just give this another try. I was told during this conversation that with the New Year coming up let's not keep rehashing this same old stuff. Well, Okay then. Why do you keep doing this to yourself, you might ask? Well, family matters to me. My family of origin matters to me. But it seems that I am the only one that it matters to.
Life can turn on a dime. I like to get all my ducks in a row, so to speak. Apparently, no one in my immediate family of origin thinks that way. I am baffled by how someone that you have been there for during rough times can just say, I am so done with you, Get out of my life, You are no longer a part of me and of course, I am supposed to just say okay.
Things are tough enough in this life without family. I am fortunate I still have some members of my family of origin that I could not have made it through this without them. My Aunt Shirley is one of them. She has been my rock and my driving force. I am extremely fortunate to have a family of choice that I have come to love as much as anyone could. My wife Kathy, her family and my dear friends. I have so much love in my life.
Yet, I still have questions and wonderings of why....
These are my thoughts and feelings from Jillsville.
With the New Year coming up I figured well, let me just give this another try. I was told during this conversation that with the New Year coming up let's not keep rehashing this same old stuff. Well, Okay then. Why do you keep doing this to yourself, you might ask? Well, family matters to me. My family of origin matters to me. But it seems that I am the only one that it matters to.
Life can turn on a dime. I like to get all my ducks in a row, so to speak. Apparently, no one in my immediate family of origin thinks that way. I am baffled by how someone that you have been there for during rough times can just say, I am so done with you, Get out of my life, You are no longer a part of me and of course, I am supposed to just say okay.
Things are tough enough in this life without family. I am fortunate I still have some members of my family of origin that I could not have made it through this without them. My Aunt Shirley is one of them. She has been my rock and my driving force. I am extremely fortunate to have a family of choice that I have come to love as much as anyone could. My wife Kathy, her family and my dear friends. I have so much love in my life.
Yet, I still have questions and wonderings of why....
These are my thoughts and feelings from Jillsville.
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