Driving in Jillsville is such an art of the highest magnitude. I have my own set of road rules and if you cross me LOOK OUT. That being said I am NOT one of those crazy road rage fanatics. Of course my wife Kathy would say differently.
To begin with driving on the beltline is NOT for the weak or faint of heart. Kathy for one HATES to drive on the beltline...I don't really mind. I travel this same route on the beltline every morning that I go to work. My idea is that some, no scratch that, most of those folks that drive this same route with me in the morning have NO glue how to drive on the beltline. First off there are 3 lanes. Now under my rules for beltline driving the right lane is for the drivers that go under the speed limit. Which by the way on the beltline is 60 mph. So that means that the right lane is for those that go either 60 mph or under. Now the middle lane are for those who go slightly above the speed limit or around 65 mph. The far left lane...Now this is where I have an issue...The far left lane or inside lane as some refer to it as...is for those like myself who want to go a bit faster.. say around 70 or 75 mph. Now what gripes my ass are those people that go 70 or 75 mph in the middle lane...and you know who you are! Now when Kathy is in the car with me I drive in the middle lane following my middle lane Jillsville rules. The first time that I drove Kathy in my car on the beltline we were dating at the time and I was in the left lane following my Jillsville rules...I wasn't sure that I was going to get her clasped hand from around the panic handle. So there you have it...
Now for parking in Jillsville. I always try to back into my parking space whenever I can do so. That way I can make a quick get away. Of course, I am not sure what I am getting away from but there ya go...that is my Jillsville reasoning at work for ya. My comment when Kathy is in the car is always {you will thank me for this later}. Well this morning when we went to UU Fellowship I was beginning my backing into the parking space routine and causing a huge back up of traffic as I was trying to maneuver my vehicle into this tight space and as always I made the comment {you will thank me for this later} well this morning her reply was {you say that every time you do this and I have NEVER wanted to or will ever thank you for doing this}.
Now once we came to a stop in this parking space the person seated in the back seat of the car parked next to us rolled down her window and said would you mind moving your car over a bit because I have a baby in here that I need more room in order to get him out of the car. So once again I started up my car and before I began to pulled up and over I had noticed that Mutti, Kathy's mother, had gotten out of the car and started to walk away so Kathy jumped out and crapped her hand and walked with her to get out of my way. Now my thoughts in my Jillsville head were...good thing I had backed in otherwise I would not have seen Mutti getting out of the car. Kathy's thoughts were much different...I could see it in her face...
Another Jillsville rule that I have is that when someone honks at me, no matter what the reason, I honk back and wave. Now this morning while on the beltline coming home from UU Fellowship we were traveling in the right lane because we were going to be exiting fairly soon to the right. I was following all the Jillsville right lane rules at the time and when my exit came I turned on my signal and began the right lane exit when all of a sudden out of no where came this single HORN blow and this car passed us, driving at a speed that was not conducive to the Jillsville driving rules for the right lane I might add. So I simply honked once and waved as he passed. Kathy once again gave me THE LOOK and said now why did you do that? My answer was because he did it first.
Now the last Jillsville driving rule that I have is simply move over when there is in coming traffic from the ramp onto the beltline. So many times when I am leaving my work or coming to work and entering the beltline there is a back up where the ramp meets the beltline simply because people aren't following the Jillsville rule of beltline ramp driving which is to MOVE over and let the traffic from the ramp come on the beltline.
Now if everyone followed these simple Jillsville driving rules life would be so much better for ME. Such is life in Jillsville.
Sunday, August 28, 2011
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Scrambled Brain Syndrome
This past week I have been dealing with health issues. My crohn's disease has been in a bit of a flare up. I have been taking antibiotics for some type of red bump on my chest. Also I am experiencing lower back pain. It seems that whenever these health issues happen and I spend time out of work this often leads to the scrambled brain syndrome.
My wife Kathy seems to find some amusing and playful pleasure from this scrambled brain syndrome of mine. The thoughts that I am thinking come out of my mouth differently than what the original thoughts are...see what I mean. Just writing these words down I get confused.
Example...just yesterday we were sitting out on the bench in the backyard talking about the red bump on my chest...my comment was that the Doctor said I can stop taking the antibiotics when the red bump begins to go away...her response was...OH NO..the Doctor said you can stop taking the antibiotics when the red bump is gone. The confusion of course is all mine.
Another example was this morning when I went into work for just a short time..a co-worker made the comment about one of our male docs not feeling well...I returned a comment that I hope she feels better...now in my scrambled brain...I heard my co-worker say her daughters name..when in fact she didn't..The confusion is all mine.
There have been many examples of this scrambled brain syndrome...but I am just too scrambled to remember at this time. I am sure that none of you have had this phenomenon.
Life is good here in Jillsville..
My wife Kathy seems to find some amusing and playful pleasure from this scrambled brain syndrome of mine. The thoughts that I am thinking come out of my mouth differently than what the original thoughts are...see what I mean. Just writing these words down I get confused.
Example...just yesterday we were sitting out on the bench in the backyard talking about the red bump on my chest...my comment was that the Doctor said I can stop taking the antibiotics when the red bump begins to go away...her response was...OH NO..the Doctor said you can stop taking the antibiotics when the red bump is gone. The confusion of course is all mine.
Another example was this morning when I went into work for just a short time..a co-worker made the comment about one of our male docs not feeling well...I returned a comment that I hope she feels better...now in my scrambled brain...I heard my co-worker say her daughters name..when in fact she didn't..The confusion is all mine.
There have been many examples of this scrambled brain syndrome...but I am just too scrambled to remember at this time. I am sure that none of you have had this phenomenon.
Life is good here in Jillsville..
Friday, August 19, 2011
My Health and My Life
I recall when I went to my surgical clinic to have shoulder surgery the anesthesia doc said to me, after reading my chart, you sure are healthy to have such health issues. That was about 4 years ago and not much has changed for me since then...
In 1981 I began loosing weight very quickly. I went from 130 lbs down to 98 lbs within a week. I was literally going at both ends. The docs in my hometown of Southern Pines weren't sure what was going on so they sent me to UNC Chapel Hill...Go Tarheels!...That is where I met a wonderful Doctor as well as human being Dr. Douglas Drossman. He was a fellow at the time with the (GastroIntestinal) clinic aka GI clinic. We hit it off instantly. He is such an amazing person. He brought me out of many many close calls with my health and he still does. He diagnosed me, with my first health ailment, Crohn's Disease. I was 21 years old.
Crohn's Disease is an inflammation of the colon. In other words I have ulcers in my colon. Back before I got sober it seems that my Crohn's Disease was always active. It never occurred to me that the alcohol irritated my disease as much as it did. At one time they believed that it was inherited from generation to generation to the first born child. My bio Dad's older brother had it so I am told and since I was the first born of my bio Dad's I have it. But now they are saying that is not so. It does tend to run in families but they just don't know why at this time.
For many years we treated the Crohn's Disease with medications such as Prednisone, Antibiotics such as Flagyl, Cipro and last but not least Sulphazaline which I am still taking and have for many years. My disease still flares up now and again. In fact, right now it is flaring but not as bad as it has in the past. Last year it flared up really bad. I was on both Flagyl and Cipro. I had to go on FMLA for 3 months. This was during the time Kathy and I went to Nova Scotia Canada to get married. Doctor D did allow me to go off the antibiotics 2 days before we got married. Thank Goodness.
In 1990 my second ailment came to life when I realized that my life had become unmanageable and unhealthy for me. The drinking and drugging had taken it's toll on my body. I had family members that were in AA (Alcoholics Anonymous). I started going to open speaker meetings with them and realized that this is where I belonged. So I picked up a white chip at one of the speaker meetings and I surrendered myself to AA and a whole new life journey. I would probably be dead had I not done this. My HP aka God has certainly been with me all along in my life.
In 1995 my third ailment came in the shape of a small lump on my breast. I was camping with my folks when I was in the shower and felt a lump on the side of my breast. It felt like a frozen pea. Immediately I went to the doctor when we got home. They did an ultrasound and mammogram. Then on my birthday they did a biopsy. Yup on my birthday I found out that I had Breast Cancer. It was one of those moments when it felt as though I was in a tunnel when the doc called me with the news. I could hear him talk but he sounded so far away. After hanging up with the doctor I grabbed my mother and held on tight. No tears at that time but just disbelief. I felt as though I was a deer caught in the headlights. My mother cried and held me tighter and tighter. Then I called my family one after the other beginning with the mother of my heart Aunt Shirley. I have always and will always believe in strength in numbers. The more people that knew the more prayers and support for me. Which is what I wanted and needed.
I opted for the lumpectomy. So we scheduled the surgery. They did a lymph node biopsy also which is standard procedure and one out of 8 came back positive. As my surgeon said, One Damn Lymph node. He spoke with a lisp which just gave me a bit of humor of the whole situation. Since there was a positive lymph node that meant chemotherapy along with radiation. So it began.
Having Crohn's Disease complicated my treatment for Breast Cancer. They had to sandwich in my chemo with the radiation. I can't remember how they did it...but it took a while. I remember the only time I cried was when they were marking me for the radiation. They had me in a dark room all alone on a table with only one beam of light shining on my breast. At that moment tears streamed down my face. I realized the gravity of what was going on with my body. I have always felt that I had to be strong for everyone else in my life. That was the first time that I could feel my feelings.
Two of the disease miracles in my life came in 1998 my Crohn's Disease had come to the point where we needed to remove part of my colon because it had become so diseased. While doing a cat scan they found that the cancer had metastasized on my lung. So the first miracle was that the cat scan showed a "shadow" on the screen. Mom and I were sitting in the waiting room watching doctor after doctor go in the room. Later Dr. D had told us that they were reading the images and seeing this "shadow" and not knowing what was going on they realized that it was showing cancer. The other miracle was that since I had been on chemo for so long the colon was not as diseased as it once was. First we had to get the cancer under control with Tamoxifen. Then the colon surgery happened in 2000 to remove a small section of colon.
During the years I have had many health ailments. Some tough some rough some just plain annoying. I try to find some type of humor in things around me. The emotional turmoil in my life growing up added to alot of my health problems. Today with my wife things have calmed down within my family life with her. Outside of our family life is my family of origin. That is where much of my health issues are today. So I am trying to balance my life by having a good healthy regimen of eating healthy, exercising, therapy and trying not to stress. It is so hard for me because I have always thought that I HAVE to be the one that people lean on and the one that people come to for support. I am learning little by little that I NEED support which I get every single day from my wife Kathy Bundy and her family. Also from my close network of friends you know who you are. And from some family members. The mother of my heart Aunt Shirley and some cousins.
Life should be good because we only get ONE chance at it. I am truly working hard to have that one good chance at my life.
In 1981 I began loosing weight very quickly. I went from 130 lbs down to 98 lbs within a week. I was literally going at both ends. The docs in my hometown of Southern Pines weren't sure what was going on so they sent me to UNC Chapel Hill...Go Tarheels!...That is where I met a wonderful Doctor as well as human being Dr. Douglas Drossman. He was a fellow at the time with the (GastroIntestinal) clinic aka GI clinic. We hit it off instantly. He is such an amazing person. He brought me out of many many close calls with my health and he still does. He diagnosed me, with my first health ailment, Crohn's Disease. I was 21 years old.
Crohn's Disease is an inflammation of the colon. In other words I have ulcers in my colon. Back before I got sober it seems that my Crohn's Disease was always active. It never occurred to me that the alcohol irritated my disease as much as it did. At one time they believed that it was inherited from generation to generation to the first born child. My bio Dad's older brother had it so I am told and since I was the first born of my bio Dad's I have it. But now they are saying that is not so. It does tend to run in families but they just don't know why at this time.
For many years we treated the Crohn's Disease with medications such as Prednisone, Antibiotics such as Flagyl, Cipro and last but not least Sulphazaline which I am still taking and have for many years. My disease still flares up now and again. In fact, right now it is flaring but not as bad as it has in the past. Last year it flared up really bad. I was on both Flagyl and Cipro. I had to go on FMLA for 3 months. This was during the time Kathy and I went to Nova Scotia Canada to get married. Doctor D did allow me to go off the antibiotics 2 days before we got married. Thank Goodness.
In 1990 my second ailment came to life when I realized that my life had become unmanageable and unhealthy for me. The drinking and drugging had taken it's toll on my body. I had family members that were in AA (Alcoholics Anonymous). I started going to open speaker meetings with them and realized that this is where I belonged. So I picked up a white chip at one of the speaker meetings and I surrendered myself to AA and a whole new life journey. I would probably be dead had I not done this. My HP aka God has certainly been with me all along in my life.
In 1995 my third ailment came in the shape of a small lump on my breast. I was camping with my folks when I was in the shower and felt a lump on the side of my breast. It felt like a frozen pea. Immediately I went to the doctor when we got home. They did an ultrasound and mammogram. Then on my birthday they did a biopsy. Yup on my birthday I found out that I had Breast Cancer. It was one of those moments when it felt as though I was in a tunnel when the doc called me with the news. I could hear him talk but he sounded so far away. After hanging up with the doctor I grabbed my mother and held on tight. No tears at that time but just disbelief. I felt as though I was a deer caught in the headlights. My mother cried and held me tighter and tighter. Then I called my family one after the other beginning with the mother of my heart Aunt Shirley. I have always and will always believe in strength in numbers. The more people that knew the more prayers and support for me. Which is what I wanted and needed.
I opted for the lumpectomy. So we scheduled the surgery. They did a lymph node biopsy also which is standard procedure and one out of 8 came back positive. As my surgeon said, One Damn Lymph node. He spoke with a lisp which just gave me a bit of humor of the whole situation. Since there was a positive lymph node that meant chemotherapy along with radiation. So it began.
Having Crohn's Disease complicated my treatment for Breast Cancer. They had to sandwich in my chemo with the radiation. I can't remember how they did it...but it took a while. I remember the only time I cried was when they were marking me for the radiation. They had me in a dark room all alone on a table with only one beam of light shining on my breast. At that moment tears streamed down my face. I realized the gravity of what was going on with my body. I have always felt that I had to be strong for everyone else in my life. That was the first time that I could feel my feelings.
Two of the disease miracles in my life came in 1998 my Crohn's Disease had come to the point where we needed to remove part of my colon because it had become so diseased. While doing a cat scan they found that the cancer had metastasized on my lung. So the first miracle was that the cat scan showed a "shadow" on the screen. Mom and I were sitting in the waiting room watching doctor after doctor go in the room. Later Dr. D had told us that they were reading the images and seeing this "shadow" and not knowing what was going on they realized that it was showing cancer. The other miracle was that since I had been on chemo for so long the colon was not as diseased as it once was. First we had to get the cancer under control with Tamoxifen. Then the colon surgery happened in 2000 to remove a small section of colon.
During the years I have had many health ailments. Some tough some rough some just plain annoying. I try to find some type of humor in things around me. The emotional turmoil in my life growing up added to alot of my health problems. Today with my wife things have calmed down within my family life with her. Outside of our family life is my family of origin. That is where much of my health issues are today. So I am trying to balance my life by having a good healthy regimen of eating healthy, exercising, therapy and trying not to stress. It is so hard for me because I have always thought that I HAVE to be the one that people lean on and the one that people come to for support. I am learning little by little that I NEED support which I get every single day from my wife Kathy Bundy and her family. Also from my close network of friends you know who you are. And from some family members. The mother of my heart Aunt Shirley and some cousins.
Life should be good because we only get ONE chance at it. I am truly working hard to have that one good chance at my life.
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Only Child with Siblings
Being with Kathy and her family has been a blessing on so many levels. One of which is the fact that she has siblings. She has 2 sisters and a brother that she has grown up with and grown old with. It reminds me of just how lonely I was growing up as an only child. This is my story of how I came to find out that I was an only child with siblings.
The small town that I grew up in contained a huge chunk of my family. My maternal Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles and cousins all of whom I LOVE very deeply and are all on my mothers side of the family. The family tree is a pretty good size one since my mother had 8 siblings. I never knew her oldest brother because he died at age 7 of pneumonia. He died before my mom was born so she did not know him either. At any rate growing up I always had plenty of family around. A whole bunch of cousins. Yet I always felt lonely. Never having siblings to play with, fight with or spend time with.
When I was sixteen I came across a letter that my biological father wrote to my mother asking about me and other grown up things concerning grown up financial things. Stuff that I did not understand at the time. I took the letter so I could get the return address in order to write my own letter to my bio Dad. That began a dialogue between the two of us. He sent me a picture of himself and I cherished it. My Mom found out that I was writing to my Dad and was hurt because I did not tell her about it. So I stopped writing for a while. After a few years went by we reconnected.
It was about this time that I found out that I had another brother. The circumstances that led to this revelation is a story in and of itself that I just don't want to get into with this blog. It seems that my mother had a son that she gave up for adoption a few months before she met and married my step-father. This was a very emotional time for all concerned. My Mom said she didn't want to say anything to me until I was older and she didn't want to find her son because she didn't want to disturb his life. So things just settled down after that and nothing else was said about my little Brother.
Life went on...After I Graduated from the community college I moved to Chapel Hill. This is when my Bio Dad and I reconnected. I was 21 at this point in time. I called and I went to him in Virginia where he lived and we spent the day together getting to know eachother. It was a great day. The next time we met I spent the weekend with him and his family. This is when I met my two sibs. My Sister and my Brother. We were all so young. My bio Dad and I corresponded a lot over the next couple years. Then we lost contact. It was all me. I was so young and so confused about alot of things.
I left Chapel Hill a few years later and moved back to my small hometown. It wasn't until years later that we got a certified letter from my Mothers son, my other Brother. We made arrangements for him to come to us in our small town and meet. That was about eight years ago and we still have contact through facebook and texting. My brother has two sons. I have two nephews. He has since married and has another son. So now I have 3 nephews and a sister-in-law whom I haven't met yet. I hope to remedy that soon.
Now back to my other sibs. It was several years until I heard from my bio Dad's kids. I am not exactly sure how it came about...but contact was made. I think my sister sent me her high school graduation picture along with a note. At any rate we communicated with each other off and on for a few years. Then my sister and I met for dinner when she lived here in Greensboro before she went to Colorado, where she met and married her husband and they have a daughter. It was much later when I met my brother. He lives in Atlanta with his wife and 3 kids.
Now my sibs and I communicate through Facebook. I now have one sister and two brothers. Between the three of them I have 2 nieces and 6 nephews. Life is good!
The small town that I grew up in contained a huge chunk of my family. My maternal Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles and cousins all of whom I LOVE very deeply and are all on my mothers side of the family. The family tree is a pretty good size one since my mother had 8 siblings. I never knew her oldest brother because he died at age 7 of pneumonia. He died before my mom was born so she did not know him either. At any rate growing up I always had plenty of family around. A whole bunch of cousins. Yet I always felt lonely. Never having siblings to play with, fight with or spend time with.
When I was sixteen I came across a letter that my biological father wrote to my mother asking about me and other grown up things concerning grown up financial things. Stuff that I did not understand at the time. I took the letter so I could get the return address in order to write my own letter to my bio Dad. That began a dialogue between the two of us. He sent me a picture of himself and I cherished it. My Mom found out that I was writing to my Dad and was hurt because I did not tell her about it. So I stopped writing for a while. After a few years went by we reconnected.
It was about this time that I found out that I had another brother. The circumstances that led to this revelation is a story in and of itself that I just don't want to get into with this blog. It seems that my mother had a son that she gave up for adoption a few months before she met and married my step-father. This was a very emotional time for all concerned. My Mom said she didn't want to say anything to me until I was older and she didn't want to find her son because she didn't want to disturb his life. So things just settled down after that and nothing else was said about my little Brother.
Life went on...After I Graduated from the community college I moved to Chapel Hill. This is when my Bio Dad and I reconnected. I was 21 at this point in time. I called and I went to him in Virginia where he lived and we spent the day together getting to know eachother. It was a great day. The next time we met I spent the weekend with him and his family. This is when I met my two sibs. My Sister and my Brother. We were all so young. My bio Dad and I corresponded a lot over the next couple years. Then we lost contact. It was all me. I was so young and so confused about alot of things.
I left Chapel Hill a few years later and moved back to my small hometown. It wasn't until years later that we got a certified letter from my Mothers son, my other Brother. We made arrangements for him to come to us in our small town and meet. That was about eight years ago and we still have contact through facebook and texting. My brother has two sons. I have two nephews. He has since married and has another son. So now I have 3 nephews and a sister-in-law whom I haven't met yet. I hope to remedy that soon.
Now back to my other sibs. It was several years until I heard from my bio Dad's kids. I am not exactly sure how it came about...but contact was made. I think my sister sent me her high school graduation picture along with a note. At any rate we communicated with each other off and on for a few years. Then my sister and I met for dinner when she lived here in Greensboro before she went to Colorado, where she met and married her husband and they have a daughter. It was much later when I met my brother. He lives in Atlanta with his wife and 3 kids.
Now my sibs and I communicate through Facebook. I now have one sister and two brothers. Between the three of them I have 2 nieces and 6 nephews. Life is good!
Saturday, August 13, 2011
Christians and Homosexuality = ?
These are my thoughts and feelings...Remember this is Jillsville...
Okay so HOLD on tight here it goes...I am MAD and FRUSTRATED by these so called CHRISTIANS!
The definition of Christian as stated in the Google dictionary is as follows: Professing belief in Jesus as Christ or following the religion based on the life and teachings of Jesus.
I am certainly NO expert on the Christian attitude because I am questioning the whole idea of Jesus dying on the cross for our sins, it is so hard for me to imagine that a Father would send his only son to die for people and their own sins. Now having said that please understand I do believe in a Higher Power whom I choose to call GOD {Good Orderly Direction}.
As a child going to a Christian church I grew up hearing stories of what a great man Jesus Christ was and how he NEVER judged anyone and NEVER discriminated against any one person or group of people. My thoughts are that he would be hanging his head in disgust and disbelief with how some people are treating others that are not living as the majority of folks. Love is Love and People are People. My beliefs now are leaning toward Jesus being a saint that walked the earth a long time ago..doing good and helping deeds for others and definitely NOT being judgmental and hateful against those that are different from the mainstream.
This book called the Bible was written a long time ago by a group of men and I don't care what anyone says...NO ONE follows the Bible completely. Also some so called Christians use the wording in the Bible to promote their own HATE on a minority group called Homosexuals. Granted everyone has their right to believe what they want to believe about Homosexuals...but to "cherry pick" and use quotes in the Bible for their HATE or DISLIKE of this group of individuals is just WRONG. Also to discriminate against a minority of human beings is JUST wrong and so UN CHRIST like. In my humble opinion.
Harvey Milk, one of my personal heroes of the civil rights movement, once said "The fact is that more people have been slaughtered in the name of religion than for any other single reason. That, my friend is the true perversion." He said this probably back in the 1970's shortly before he was assassinated by a co-worker simply because he was a homosexual.
Now the American Republicans and the Tea Party politicians are doing what they ALWAYS do before an election..they promote HATE in the name of Christianity. This gets their BASE all heated up and this causes nothing but trouble for a minority of people known as Homosexuals. I get so tired and frustrated with this line of action by this group of politicians. There are SO many other issues that are so much more relevant to our society and to our country.
All the postings that I have put up concerning Attacks on Homosexuals. I have FB friends posting comment such as: well the people that did this should get punished but that should be the case no matter who gets attacked. They of course are missing the whole point. Homosexuals are the ones that get attacked frequently because of the way we live and the fear that others feel toward us for some crazy reason or another. Also some FB comments are why should we have HATE CRIME legislation for "those people?" Or why should we have a law against BULLYING? Well the fact is that Homosexuals do get the worst of the legal deal. We NEED these HATE CRIME bills and the laws against BULLYING. The whole point behind me posting these examples are that Homosexuals DO get beat up and murdered simply because they are different. This NEEDS to change and the change begins with PEOPLE.
I have also put up postings about Same-Sex marriage. Some of my FB friends have said things like oh Jill...You and Kathy love each other that is all the matters..Well NO that is NOT all that matters and these well meaning friends just infuriate me even more with these, what I feel are, flip comments. We have the Republican and Tea Party politicians Santorum, Bachmann, Pawlenty and Romney that have all signed this so called Marriage Pledge. This is one of the most horrible forms of disgrace and discrimination that I have ever heard of. If you are against Same-Sex marriage that is your prerogative but to actually sign something as horrible and despicable as this and call it a good thing for America is just WRONG. In my opinion.
We should be trying to bring America together NOT keep tearing it apart and that is what these so called "Christians and Christian politcians" are doing they are tearing America apart with their homophobia and hurtful feelings toward a minority group of people called Homosexuals. ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. Come on Americans stand up and stand proud and stand for EQUALITY FOR ALL.
Okay so HOLD on tight here it goes...I am MAD and FRUSTRATED by these so called CHRISTIANS!
The definition of Christian as stated in the Google dictionary is as follows: Professing belief in Jesus as Christ or following the religion based on the life and teachings of Jesus.
I am certainly NO expert on the Christian attitude because I am questioning the whole idea of Jesus dying on the cross for our sins, it is so hard for me to imagine that a Father would send his only son to die for people and their own sins. Now having said that please understand I do believe in a Higher Power whom I choose to call GOD {Good Orderly Direction}.
As a child going to a Christian church I grew up hearing stories of what a great man Jesus Christ was and how he NEVER judged anyone and NEVER discriminated against any one person or group of people. My thoughts are that he would be hanging his head in disgust and disbelief with how some people are treating others that are not living as the majority of folks. Love is Love and People are People. My beliefs now are leaning toward Jesus being a saint that walked the earth a long time ago..doing good and helping deeds for others and definitely NOT being judgmental and hateful against those that are different from the mainstream.
This book called the Bible was written a long time ago by a group of men and I don't care what anyone says...NO ONE follows the Bible completely. Also some so called Christians use the wording in the Bible to promote their own HATE on a minority group called Homosexuals. Granted everyone has their right to believe what they want to believe about Homosexuals...but to "cherry pick" and use quotes in the Bible for their HATE or DISLIKE of this group of individuals is just WRONG. Also to discriminate against a minority of human beings is JUST wrong and so UN CHRIST like. In my humble opinion.
Harvey Milk, one of my personal heroes of the civil rights movement, once said "The fact is that more people have been slaughtered in the name of religion than for any other single reason. That, my friend is the true perversion." He said this probably back in the 1970's shortly before he was assassinated by a co-worker simply because he was a homosexual.
Now the American Republicans and the Tea Party politicians are doing what they ALWAYS do before an election..they promote HATE in the name of Christianity. This gets their BASE all heated up and this causes nothing but trouble for a minority of people known as Homosexuals. I get so tired and frustrated with this line of action by this group of politicians. There are SO many other issues that are so much more relevant to our society and to our country.
All the postings that I have put up concerning Attacks on Homosexuals. I have FB friends posting comment such as: well the people that did this should get punished but that should be the case no matter who gets attacked. They of course are missing the whole point. Homosexuals are the ones that get attacked frequently because of the way we live and the fear that others feel toward us for some crazy reason or another. Also some FB comments are why should we have HATE CRIME legislation for "those people?" Or why should we have a law against BULLYING? Well the fact is that Homosexuals do get the worst of the legal deal. We NEED these HATE CRIME bills and the laws against BULLYING. The whole point behind me posting these examples are that Homosexuals DO get beat up and murdered simply because they are different. This NEEDS to change and the change begins with PEOPLE.
I have also put up postings about Same-Sex marriage. Some of my FB friends have said things like oh Jill...You and Kathy love each other that is all the matters..Well NO that is NOT all that matters and these well meaning friends just infuriate me even more with these, what I feel are, flip comments. We have the Republican and Tea Party politicians Santorum, Bachmann, Pawlenty and Romney that have all signed this so called Marriage Pledge. This is one of the most horrible forms of disgrace and discrimination that I have ever heard of. If you are against Same-Sex marriage that is your prerogative but to actually sign something as horrible and despicable as this and call it a good thing for America is just WRONG. In my opinion.
We should be trying to bring America together NOT keep tearing it apart and that is what these so called "Christians and Christian politcians" are doing they are tearing America apart with their homophobia and hurtful feelings toward a minority group of people called Homosexuals. ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. Come on Americans stand up and stand proud and stand for EQUALITY FOR ALL.
Friday, August 12, 2011
Hot Dogs and Alzheimer's
So last night was one of those nights where I got THE LOOK from Kathy. It seems there was a wad of something black on the floor. I thought perhaps it was the dreaded huge hair ball in my path on the rug in the bedroom. So I said something to Kathy while at the same time going into the bathroom to get some toilet paper in order to pick up the wad of whatever it was on the rug. By the time I got back to where it was Kathy had picked it up..in her bare hands. EwEw..She saw me with the toilet paper and said what are you doing??? Along with the comment was THE LOOK and then the snicker...I preceded to give her the toilet paper and left her to the disposal of whatever it was. She said it was a wad of lint...sure ... I am NOT buying it...
Buddy was wide open this morning as usual. He had plenty of Buddy kisses for us when we woke up and started to move in the bed. We didn't take him to the dog park like we usually do on Friday's. But he seemed okay with it. We did spend alot of time with Mutti today.
Today started at The Heritage a senior living community where Kathy's Mom, whom I affectionately call Mutti, lives. We awoke early and the three of us took a brisk walk around the block. While we walked Mutti would kick whatever was in her path, pine cones, gum balls, or rocks. She also began whistling. I was not sure at what or why. She just looked into the wooded areas and whistled with intent and passion. Well it seems that she was talking to the birds with her whistling. I found all of this very entertaining and amusing also very thought provoking. I learn so much from Mutti each and every time that I am around her. She lives in the moment and cherishes each and every one of those moments with her smile and her grace. This week has been interesting because we have spent alot of time together. Last night someone came up to our table while we were having dinner and asked Mutti is this your family...well Mutti put her arm out and touched Kathy on the shoulder and said this is my daughter Kathy. Then she looked over at me and said this is a very very special friend of the family Jill. My heart fell just a bit. Unbeknownst to me later on when I left the table to fetch us some coffee Kathy leaned over to her and said Mom you can say that Jill is your daughter or daughter-in-law. This disease is very baffling at times because Mutti not to long before this incident knew who I was and what "part" that I play in the family so to speak.
Today was The Heritage fundraiser for Alzheimer's. It was Hot Dog Day. We sat outside under a big umbrella at one of the many tables on the patio and enjoyed our Hot Dog. We took many pictures of the event. It was a good time and Mutti seemed to be present for the most part.
Tonight we have a play to go that Barb her youngest daughter is in. It is the female version of The Odd Couple. We are suppose to meet Mutti for dinner over at The Heritage and then head out to the play. I can't wait to see what adventures await us...
Buddy was wide open this morning as usual. He had plenty of Buddy kisses for us when we woke up and started to move in the bed. We didn't take him to the dog park like we usually do on Friday's. But he seemed okay with it. We did spend alot of time with Mutti today.
Today started at The Heritage a senior living community where Kathy's Mom, whom I affectionately call Mutti, lives. We awoke early and the three of us took a brisk walk around the block. While we walked Mutti would kick whatever was in her path, pine cones, gum balls, or rocks. She also began whistling. I was not sure at what or why. She just looked into the wooded areas and whistled with intent and passion. Well it seems that she was talking to the birds with her whistling. I found all of this very entertaining and amusing also very thought provoking. I learn so much from Mutti each and every time that I am around her. She lives in the moment and cherishes each and every one of those moments with her smile and her grace. This week has been interesting because we have spent alot of time together. Last night someone came up to our table while we were having dinner and asked Mutti is this your family...well Mutti put her arm out and touched Kathy on the shoulder and said this is my daughter Kathy. Then she looked over at me and said this is a very very special friend of the family Jill. My heart fell just a bit. Unbeknownst to me later on when I left the table to fetch us some coffee Kathy leaned over to her and said Mom you can say that Jill is your daughter or daughter-in-law. This disease is very baffling at times because Mutti not to long before this incident knew who I was and what "part" that I play in the family so to speak.
Today was The Heritage fundraiser for Alzheimer's. It was Hot Dog Day. We sat outside under a big umbrella at one of the many tables on the patio and enjoyed our Hot Dog. We took many pictures of the event. It was a good time and Mutti seemed to be present for the most part.
Tonight we have a play to go that Barb her youngest daughter is in. It is the female version of The Odd Couple. We are suppose to meet Mutti for dinner over at The Heritage and then head out to the play. I can't wait to see what adventures await us...
Thursday, August 11, 2011
Life As I Know It In Jillsville: My Life In Jillsville
Just a note to let you know that I am NOT the writer in the family the writer in the family is my wife Kathy. So this is my disclaimer the following blog will contain many grammar and comma mistakes so don’t be surprised to find a few along the way. I guess I should have paid more attention in English class while I was in school. Of course I did marry a woman who is a person who knows her English and a school teacher.
So I made my way to Raleigh in 2001 from the town of Southern Pines where I was born and raised and where most of my family of origin still lives. Moving here was THE best decision I could have made. It was also a huge culture shock for me. The LGBT community here is so much bigger than it was in Southern Pines. To me this is the BIG city and I love it! I found an AA group pretty quick. It is a gay/lesbian group. From there I found my friends and connections into the community.
In 2002 I met a woman who would later become my wife Kathy. We met in an AA meeting not the gay/lesbian meeting but an eatin meetin. We would go to K&W cafeteria after the meeting with a group of people from the meeting. It was a fun time that is for sure and some really good memories. Kathy had NO idea what she was getting into when she began dating me. In fact I am still amazed that she still married me. It must be LOVE.
Let me explain my above comment about Kathy not knowing what she was getting into with me. . I have many OCD {Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder} thoughts and behaviors that sometimes can become very stifling for me and those around me. My OCD is also the reason for this blog Jillsville. As my profile says many of my friends/family has said to me that you live in your own world which is true. In fact, more times than not.
One of my many OCD issues is HAIR. You know the ones that fall from your head or other body parts and land on the floor of your bathroom. UGH. Kathy always gives me {the look} you know the one…where the mouth is wrenched upward and the eyes are narrowed. Because I solve the HAIR problem by using the broom and dust pan combo that we keep in our bathroom. I sweep up the hair all the time. Whenever we have people over I try to make our bathroom off limits. But if someone does happen to use our toilet I clean it with the Clorox cleaner that we use. Then I change all the towels on the racks. Yes this is true it is what I do. But it works for me. Kathy has gotten use to it from me. She doesn’t say a word now. She just smiles and gives me {THE LOOK}.
Another one of my OCD issues are GERMS. If someone coughs or sneezes within ear shot of me I just cringe. Then I get {THE LOOK} from Kathy. It is hard during the cold season for me. My co workers are probably tired of me going around wiping down everything with my antiseptic rag.
Then of course there are the thoughts that I have that make perfect since to me but not to others. Hence Jillsville is born and full of humor and some thoughts and feelings that are mine alone that make perfect sense to me. .
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