CHANGES

There are so many changes happening in our home and in our lives at this point in time. These changes stem from two main situations one of which is Mutti moving in with us and the other one is the death of Lucky Lu. 

Mutti moving in is something that simply had to happen. There were NO if, ands or buts about it. The idea of putting her in a "lock down" facility just was not a viable option for us. The changes have been gradual and more revealed every day. The first of which is the fact that Kathy and I find it hard to have time alone together in our own home. This morning was nice because Mutti slept in which gave us a chance to spend some alone time in bed together until she woke up. This time allowed us a chance to "catch up" and talk about our feelings and what's going on in our lives as separate individuals. Because once Mutti wakes up the whole house must wake up. Because if we don't she would be on her own to wonder around and get lost and not know what to do.  

She still is not sure where she is, meaning that this is her home now also. Today she spent a good deal of time out under the gazebo just sitting. Then she came in and made the comment to me that she didn't want to be in the way and where should she go now. I wasn't sure how to respond to that so I simply said to her that she is NOT in our way and that I didn't want her to say that again. I told her this was her home now as well as ours.
 
We are no longer able to just take off and go as we once were without first planning ahead and checking with the family to see if someone could stay with Mutti. Whether it be shopping, going to the theater, date night or  just hanging with friends.  I did say to Kathy the other night that I do want a date night with her. We are planning to go to the Oakwood Candlelight Tour the first of December. It was between that or the theater. Perhaps we can do both. We do have the help of the family which is very fortunate for us. We can plan ahead and someone will step in and look after Mutti for a few hours. Thank goodness otherwise we would be in bad shape. Also Jack helps out alot. We are very fortunate. 

Kathy found a facility called SarahCare that specializes in Alzheimer care for the elderly and Mutti seems to like it. She has been there once for a free visit. The plan is to take Mutti there on one of my day offs so that Kathy and I can spend some time together during the day just the two of us. We plan on doing this a couple a days a week. That way Kathy can have a break also during the week for some alone time. That is very important. 

This is ALL a work in progress for both of us. It is what it is and that is fine. Our motto "It's All Good" is so true. We are working it out and learning as we go. It seems to be bringing Kathy and I closer together.

The other change to affect our family and home was Lucky Lu dying it was so hard for me/us and it still is. There is a huge void in our family. She was the critter matriarch. Buddy seems to be moving in to that position with certain things that he is doing now- that he didn't do before. There are still times at night when we go to bed that I listen for the click click click of Lucky Lu's paw nails on the wood floor when she would come to bed after we did. Even now I wake up in the morning and am careful not to step on her because she would lay on the floor on my side of the bed. Sometimes I wake up to go to the bathroom during the night and step over the place where she use to lay down in the middle of the floor. This to shall pass I know but right now it is so hard because she was a huge part of my life and she always will be no matter what.

 These changes that are happening will continue to happen. Everyday will be a different day and some of these situations will get easier or more manageable as we move on in our lives together the three of us along with the two remaining critters. It's All Good in the Bundy~Bundy~Kidd household.

These are my thoughts and feelings from Jillsville.